Sabrina Keign

My sister gave birth 5 days ago...Sab is super duper adorable. Now I know how it feels to be want to hold a baby so badly but can't. I actually almost cried after seeing a few of her pictures. Who knew, someone so young could make me want to cry so badly? Haha She makes me feel less guilty about the leaving my sister behind issue that always bothered me. For those who don't know, my grandparents petitioned my parents years ago, sometime before 1993, to be a little more exact lol. The significance with that is the fact that I wasn't born yet when the petition was filed. It is also the reason why in 2002(I'm pretty sure, but not really haha) my name was not present in my family's papers. My sister was twenty then, that year, she was going to turn twenty-one, thus, no longer eligible to go to New Jersey with my family. Since my name wasn't on the papers, my parents panicked and filed papers to include me, the only problem was that it took at least year for that to happen. By then my sister was already twenty-one. Ever since then I have felt absolutely guilty that she wasn't able to come with us. Things truly happen for a reason, had we not been delayed a year, my sister would not be blessed with such a precious child as Sabrina. :) My sister and I have always been close so when I told her years ago how I truly felt, she told me that nothing was my fault and stuff that I didn't want to believe, somehow, that made sense to me, to blame myself. Congratulations to my sister and her boyfriend! I want to see Sabrina so badly.<3

It's a good thing my sister takes a lot of pictures like me :) If not for her posting pictures of Sab, I'd be totally depressed...even our brother looks at her pictures at least once a day.   Ahhh I just want to see her so badly and hold her...the instance I know how to take care of a baby I can't. The irony of it all. I seriously wasn't ready to hold my nephews four and two years ago but now that I can, I can't. Seriously, I wish I could "apparate" there :)  Hopefully I will get to see them in two years, hopefully that's when my sister can go here and live with us already!


gigi said…
you made me cry too... you are right if not for the delay your kuya benjie and I would not be blessed with a beautiful child named Sabrina. She reminds me of you. I told her that you were the first person to sleep in my chest and no one can take that away from you. We will see you soon.

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