I'm currently hurting emotionally and physically....I tried running again, and I'm definitely not fit.
I'm hurting emotionally because I thought I was going to get the closure I wanted and the closure I thought I needed. You left me because you were hungry and needed to shower. I mean I probably did have something to do with it too, but you were just in a rush to get out of there. I had so many questions I wanted to ask. Right now I don't know what to think of my memories with you. I don't know if they're tainted because of how you acted yesterday or if I'm only thinking that now.
The worst part has to be that I can't go back and ask for another closure. You mocked me while I was vulnerable and I don't think I can do that again. I want to, and I know if I did, people would think I'm going to keep clinging to you. I'm sure you would too. You mocked the notion of me not talking to you forever. It feels like the whole 6 years was a lie. I don't know when you were ever sincere with me now.

You reduced me to someone you text to ask for a prayer.
You made sure to rub it in my face that you never text me.
You said you understand but you don't, I spent 6 years of my life being friends with you and meaning it. Your smirk yesterday throughout our conversation makes me think you only wanted to have me around to know that someone could fall so head over heels in love with you. I'm not strong enough to stay away from you.

Who knew that the one thing I hated about our characteristics would save me from more heartache?
I never have to see you again, we don't go to the same places, ever!
I'll be reminded of you in so many ways and that's my fault. I get too attached to people and remember the stupidest things about them

I'm mad right now because you made me feel stupid for thinking that you were just the nice friend who liked having me as a friend because I was a good friend. I feel like this whole time I was just there to make you feel special. i was only there so you could brag to your best friend about this girl who would do anything for you.

How did I get here? I'm heart broken without having been in a real relationship.
I cry for memories I have with a guy who never cared.


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